The Funding's come through
By Gael Finch
The funding's come through, the drug's on its way
I should be jumping for joy, I hear you all say,
Relapses halved, or maybe no more;
But the mere mention of needles and I’m on the floor!
Still the video they’ve sent me makes it all sound OK,
“You get used to it”, or at least that’s what they say.
I know I’ll have to be brave but it’s going to be tough,
Sometimes I just feel like shouting, “Enough is enough!”
The pack gets delivered by a very nice man,
Straight to your door in a little white van.
There’s swabs and there’s needles, of varying sizes
For sticking in tummies, bottoms and thighses!
There’s a vial adapter, or should that be vile?
Tell me why on the video does everyone smile?
The Betaferon itself in the fridge does belong;
They send you a thermometer, so you can’t go far wrong.
To complete the pack there’s a big yellow bin
To put all your empties and sharp "thingies" in.
So now you’ve all this and you’re ready to start,
And the video says, “Just pretend it’s a dart”
Well I’ve been to the pub, and watched darts on TV,
And darts go in a dartboard, and not in me,
But the girl on the video, she seems to be fine;
Her fatty bits can’t be much different to mine!
So I gather together all the things that I need,
The video I watch, the instructions I read,
And what do you know I’ve just injected myself,
All done and dusted, things back on the shelf.
Now if I can do it then anyone can,
And needles? Well OK, so I’m still not a fan,
But I’ve proved you can do it, you can conquer fear
I’d be fine if the blotches would just disappear!
Still what’s a few blotches, a small price to pay
If the Betaferon really keeps MS at bay,
Does it work? who can tell, we’ll just wait and see
In the meantime goodbye from blotchy old me!
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